MakeMineTrauma Gets Two Turtle Doves

On the second day of Christmas, your true love gave to you, two turtle doves!

Yum, how are you going to cook them?

Well, if he was truly my true love, he would give them to me already cooked cause he would know that I suck at cooking things. Otherwise, if they were alive, I would have to keep them until they died of natural causes or old age.

Q.1 In ten words or less, tell us exactly what a Surgical Technologist-Certified is.

Someone certified in the technology of surgery.

Q.2 What's the best part of your job? The worst?

Seeing all of the hot male surgeons in scrubs and trying to guess which ones are going "commando". The worst part...changing clothes, getting into and out of scrubs up to four times a day (you are supposed to change into hospital specific scrubs) and not having any fun while your clothes are off.

Q.3 Did you have another career before you became involved in medicine?

Autos - from armored trucks to taxis, driving them, fixing them, selling their parts, and cattle-herding them, branding them, castrating them, eating their parts.

Q.4 Explain in detail that fancy way you have of washing your hands before entering the OR.

Oh my. First scrub of the day involves a pre-wash cycle and rinse. Next, cleaning under the fingernails with a plastic whatever that thing is called, then, with the scrub sponge, scrubbing yourcuticles (feels so good!), each finger gets it next on all four sides, include the web spaces in between, the front and back of each hand, then up the arm, I do three sections, from the wrist to half-way up to the elbow, then from that point to the crook of my elbow, and the final spot is the from the elbow to two inches above. Then you rinse each arm individually with the water always flowing away from your hand and towards the elbow. Or in my case, away from my hands and all over my front. The rest you've seen on T.V. Except we always tie our own masks, you don't scrub with your mask hanging around your neck then walk into the OR and have the nurse tie it for you.

Q.5 What is the most bizarre case you have ever worked on? And when I say bizarre, I'm really talking gerbils, etc.

Teratomas are really cool. I can imagine them coming out kicking and screaming. With bone and hair, all balled up, they kinda remind me gerbils, or maybe I'm thinking of tribbles. I've only seen alittle one in person, but it was pretty freaky. By the way, did you know that prisoners have a secret place to carry their shiv?

Q.6 Be honest, who exactly sees you nekkid in the OR?

Unfortunately, nobody. Oh wait, did you mean as a patient?

Q.7 What's the most useless thing you have ever bought?

One of those ab stimulator, imitation tens machine thingys. Yeah, I fell for it too.

Q.8 If you could have a superpower, what would it be?

It would have to be to be able to fly, which is interesting considering that you can't get me on an airplane. I know, you were expecting something selfless.

Q.9 Tell us about the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you on the job.

It's so embarrassing that I can't tell you. But then again, if you really want to print it........the most embarrassing thing was being scrubbed in for an exceptionally long case and having my "feminine products" exceed capacity.

Q.10 What food do you absolutely hate and will never eat?

Liver, liver, liver, and I've seen some pretty tasty livers.

Q.11 What's the name of one movie that you watch over and over?

My attention barely holds for one viewing. Here are some that I would consider watching again....Finding Nemo, The Cowboys, Napoleon Dynamite, Dances with Wolves

Q.12 For the most part, nurses and doctors don't really bitch about each other in the medblogs. Is that because there is not that much to bitch about or do you think they are just playing nice on their medblogs?

Well, I can't really speak for the medblogs but in the OR even if you despise one of the OR team, during the surgery everybody maintains professional conduct because in there, it is about the patient. I think professionalism tends to carry over to the outside world also.

Q.13 What do your co-workers do that really irritate you?

Eat the last doughnut or piece of raisin bread. Actually my biggest pet peeve is sloppy sterile technique.

Q.14 Tell me the craziest thing you have ever seen at one of those wild hospital Christmas parties I'm always hearing about.

I always seem to miss the scandals but I can tell you that while the bathrooms may appear as gender specific early on, by the end of the night you never know what you may find in the bathroom stall.

Q.15 Do you play a musical instrument?

My cat does a pretty good yodel if I simultaneously squeeze and bounce him just right.

Holiday Quickfire Questions

Favorite…

a. reindeer - The Grinch's dog in antlers. (the original animated version).

b. cookie - Snickerdoodle, or any cookie with those little silver candy balls or red hots on them.

c. carol - Burnett [ohh, that’s bad ~ MA]

d. holiday television show - The Ref

e. activity – eating [I have to agree ~ MA]

Thank you for being my second day of Christmas, Trauma Junkie a/k/a Make Mine Trauma @IntraopOrate.