Sunday, June 24, 2007

I Want to be Dirty Too

I can’t stand it. It’s killing me that ATM is only rated PG. It’s torture. Everyone else's blogs are rated PG-13 and up. I'm tired of being the good girl. I can’t help it if the only time I write about BF is when I’m pissed at him. He may be an old fart trial attorney, but he can be sexy. For example, last night he cut up a chicken with a knife and then tossed the chicken on the grill shotgun style. The chicken breasts and thighs were awesome and he whipped up some ass-kicking BBQ sauce. You can't tell me that a man cooking dinner for a woman isn't sexy. Plus we had sex on the beach.** Twice!

Obviously, posting pictures of half-naked men and writing about butt-pus isn’t enough. I need to write more about body parts. But it’s not going to be easy. When I was writing my post on the positive Throckmorton sign, I couldn’t even bring myself to type the word penis. Instead I chose to link to an X-ray on MDOD and let them explain the implications of a left or right pointing penis.

I guess I can always re-publish the post that I took down last week—-you know, the one about me writing a sexy letter to our client about my PANTIES.

** Sex on the Beach
1 fluid ounce vodka
1/2 fluid ounce melon liqueur
1/2 fluid ounce raspberry flavored liqueur
1 1/2 fluid ounces pineapple juice
1 1/2 fluid ounces cranberry juice

Crap--I want my money back. All those penises and all I got was a lousy PG-13.

Online Dating

Mingle2 - Online Dating


Anonymous said...

Oh, that's hilarious...I had to try and I knew I'd get a bad one...NC-17 for PA!

I added it to my blog courtesy of you...

MonkeyGirl said...

You need to write about pain. I got an "R" because I write so much about pain. (With all the damn drug seekers out there, how can I not?)

PS: I got a kick out of the panty post. I got even more of a kick out of the fact that you took it down. ;-)

Doc's Girl said...

Sexy post. :) MA, you need to get to your true perverted roots...:-P NC-17 will come in due time...!

jmb said...

I love this MBA, you've got to try harder. As expected I am a G. One only mention of death. Still I'm a "little old lady" so what would you expect.

911DOC said...

do bad words in your comments contribute to your rating? just in case, reading your blog give me a PRIAPISM and makes me suffer FECAL INCONTINENCE at the same time. it makes my KLUVER-BUCY SYNDROME worse too but i can't stop reading it because i'm a NYMPHOMANIAC with TESTICULAR HYPERTROPHY and ELAPHANTIASIS OF THE PENIS. unfortunately, while reading, the batteries on MY DILDO ran out and i had to run to the store for more when i saw some WHORES on the corner and was also able to procure COCAINE, CRYSTAL METH, AND MARIJUANA from some CONVICTED FELONS who were engaged in FELLATIO. hope that helps.

Medblog Addict said...

Thanks, but pictures would have made it more special.

I only had to look up KLUVER-BUCY SYNDROME -- "oral tendencies" isn't necessarily a bad thing, is it?